One of the most frightening questions parents face after separation is whether their ex-partner can prevent them from seeing their children.

The short answer is no—but the full picture is more nuanced.

Equal Parental Responsibility Until Court Says Otherwise

When parents separate, both retain equal parental responsibility by default.

This means neither parent has more legal right to the children than the other, regardless of who moved out, who earns more, or who has been the primary caregiver.

Your ex cannot unilaterally decide you don't get to see the kids.

They cannot change the locks, refuse handovers, or make decisions about schooling, medical care, or where the children live without your involvement—unless there are existing court orders or serious safety concerns.

When Can a Parent Stop Contact?

There are limited circumstances where preventing contact may be legally justified:

Immediate Safety Concerns: If a parent genuinely believes the children are at immediate risk of harm, they may temporarily withhold contact and urgently apply for court orders. However, this cannot be based on spite, suspicion, or unsubstantiated allegations.

Existing Court Orders: If the Federal Circuit and Family Court has made orders specifying parenting arrangements, those orders are legally binding. Breaching them without a reasonable excuse is a criminal offence.

Police Protection Directions or Domestic Violence Orders: In Queensland, police can now issue Police Protection Directions that may restrict contact. Similarly, domestic violence orders may include conditions about contact with children.

What If Your Ex Is Withholding the Kids?

If your ex is refusing to let you see the children without legal justification:

Document Everything: Keep records of refused contact, cancelled handovers, unanswered messages, and any threats made. This evidence may be critical later.

Attempt Mediation: Before going to court, most parenting disputes require you to attempt Family Dispute Resolution (mediation) with an accredited practitioner. This demonstrates your willingness to resolve things cooperatively.

Apply for Court Orders: If mediation fails or isn't appropriate, you can apply to the Federal Circuit and Family Court for parenting orders. The court will make orders in the children's best interests, which generally includes maintaining meaningful relationships with both parents where safe.

Consider Urgent Action: In serious cases where a parent has taken the children and disappeared, urgent recovery orders may be necessary. Legal advice should be obtained immediately.

What the Court Actually Considers

The court's paramount concern is the children's best interests.

This includes:

• The benefit of having a meaningful relationship with both parents

• The need to protect children from harm, including exposure to family violence

• Each parent's capacity to meet the children's needs

• The children's own views (depending on age and maturity)

• Each parent's willingness to support the other parent's relationship with the children

Courts do not favour one parent over the other based on gender, who left the relationship, or who was the primary income earner.

The focus is entirely on what serves the children best.

False Allegations & Parental Alienation

Courts take a dim view of parents who make false allegations to limit the other parent's time or who attempt to damage the children's relationship with the other parent.

This behaviour can backfire significantly in court proceedings.

If you believe false allegations are being made, obtaining legal advice early is critical.

What Should You Do Right Now?

If your ex is preventing contact:

1. Stay calm and don't retaliate by withholding child support or making threats

2. Document all refused contact and communication

3. Attempt to resolve things through respectful communication or mediation

4. Obtain legal advice about your rights and options

5. Consider applying for court orders if necessary

The court system exists to protect children's rights to have relationships with both parents where safe and appropriate.

Your ex cannot simply decide you don't get to see your kids.

Get Clear Legal Advice

If you're being denied time with your children, understanding your legal position and options is critical.

Munce Legal assists Sunshine Coast parents with parenting arrangements, mediation, and court proceedings when necessary.

Book a Free 30 Minute Consultation below, to discuss your situation confidentially and understand the most effective pathway forward.